“Listen to them, the children of the night. What sweet music they make.”
Bram Stoker’s Dracula (1992) (Dracula).....Velcome to my humble Halloween blog....bahhhaaaaa!!!!!! Ok...enough cheesy Vampire humor for right this moment, but I'm not promising that there won't be more!!! So when you least expect it....EXPECT IT!!! Scared yet...nah, me neither. Let me first acknowledge the person whoes subject suggestion for this little trip into the Twilight Zone that is my mind was picked as part of a raffle I was having for my Tastefully Simple endeavor . That person is .....drum rolll......Denise Csokuly. I know Denise from one of the scariest places in the ENTIRE WORLD...COPERATE AMERICA, bahhhhaaa! Ok, i'm over using the bahhhaaa. So, as Rod Sterling would say "You are traveling through another dimension, a demension of not only sight and sound,but of mind. Journey through a wondrous land of imagination....next stop....THE TWILIGHT ZONE!!!". So, children of the night, we are going to visit with some of Pammy's favorite people (?) in the whold world. The Vampire. Next to a good visit to a cemetary I love to spend me some time with me homies, the Vamps! So many to chose from, where do I begin (wait, that's the start to a song that is totally unrelated and way too sunny for this subject!) I will start with the what a Vampire is "supposed to be". Vampire is a corspe supposed to leave it's grave at night and drink the blood of the living. They prey ruthlessly on others (ruthless...did someone call my younger sister???.) Haha...ok, i'm the only one who laughed. Let's start with my FAVORITE of all times Vampire....Come on down BARNABAS COLLINS!!!! Barnabas, aka Canadian actor Johnathan Frid is 200 year old vampire from my favorite soap opera of all times, Dark Shadows. Dark Shadows ran from 1966-1971. Barnabas was 200 years old 30 years ago, so time to update his resume. His turn on's are stalking pretty young girls, drinking blood and an occasional game of billiards. He is a gentlement after all! Turn off's....stakes and sunlight. He was my first vampire love at the age of 10. He had a bad Julius Ceasar hair cut and was oft featured in my favorite magazine, 16. He was romantic and tortured and yes, heroic and every time he bit one of his lovelies you cheered as Barnabas would live to see another sunset....sighhh! I understand Johnny Depp is going to bring my beloved Barnabas back to life on the big screen. Let's hope Johnny can keep his fangs in his mouth better than Johnathan Frid did (lord that sounded dirty, it's just sometimes in the 60's special effects were not that good and Barnabas's fangs would slip). Here's to hoping Mr. Depp does my Barnabas proud. Fun fact....Freud even wrote articles of the subject of Dracula and believe it or not he decided there were sexual connontations of it. Well durrr Dr. Freud!
Our next Vamp to visit would be that rascal Vlad III Prince of Wallochia 1431-
1476. Vlad's love name was Vlad the Impailer due to the fact that his idea of a good time was to impale his victims on a stake and leave them out for all to see. I imagine it cut down on bothersome calls from door to door sales people. His victims were estimated in the 10's of thousands. He was the inspiration for the modern day Dracula and he was not at all warm and fuzzy like I like my Vamps.
Enter the ever popular Count Dracula who was portrayed on Broadway and the silver screen by the late great Bela Lugosi. He was a Hungarian born actor and was enterally type cast as ole Drac. Poor Bela was even buried in his Dracula costume. The word Dracula actually mean's Son of the Dragon. I would be remiss in not mentioning Nosferatu who was the "star" of of a 1921 German Expressionist film. He had long pointy fingers, bad teeth and a bald head, not my idea of the Vamp of my dreams, but he was a key to get to where we are today with Vampires, so deserves a "participation" trophy.
In the 60's we had a diverse Vampire community. Not only did we have Barnabas Collins batting around. We had Count Chocula and Count Count. Count Chocula hit hard times as had to resort to selling breakfast cereal to pesky human children during Saturday morning cartoons. Count Count on the other hand hit the big time with a little show we like to call Sesame Street. His job was to teach the youngsters to count. Someone asked Count Count in an interview how old he was and he replied that he was 1,832,652 years old. Now that would make him predate man, so we actually think The Count started counting years and forgot to stop! Even the kiddies have their own Vampire hero's. Now I do us the word hero, because that is often how the modern day Vampire is portrayed.
This leads us to a few more contemporary Vampires. First off there is Spike. Spike was created from the strange little mind of Joss Wheadon for the program Buffy the Vampire Slayer (she best leave my Barnabas alone!) Spike was a Billy Idol wanna be who rocked white blonde spikey hair and a long black leather coat (rock the cradle of love, rock the cradle of love) oh wait, Billy Idol, that's another blog. He had a lovely English accent and I would have given him my neck anytime!!! His Vampire name was William the Bloody and aquired the name Spike for his method of killing slayers. Ultimately he fell in love with the Slayer, Buffy, talk about a mixed marriage. Then Spike in the most noble of jestures gave his life to save the world and his beloved Buffy,who was a step up from the crazy as bat shit (haha, get it?? bat shit, Oh well I liked it!) Drucilla he had been hanging out with! So romantic and it only took an occasional offering of blood.
Jumping now to more modern Vampires we have Bill from True Blood who spends most of his time buck neked and saving poor Sookie Stackhouse from other evil no good nicks. Sometimes he's naked for that activity or other times he does have some very nice clothes, but they really are optional in Bill the Vampire's world. Either way he could fang me anytime. Whoops, I think that was dirty, oh well...it's the truth!. Bill leads us into our last stop in Vampire land and that would to be visit Edward Cullen. Beautiful, tortured (are we seeing a pattern here yet children of the night?) Edward. He can go out in daylight and all he does is SPARKLE! Sparkle...WTF. I like my Vampires to burn in the sun like all good vampires should. I don't want them to look like they just visited Liberace's make up man. Edward is in love with poor lost, no one understands me, Bella. I think she's a pain in the ass personally. For the first time in my vampire history my heart is screaming "pick the werewolf"! Don't get me wrong, I am a major Twihard and can't wait for the next movie, I just root for team Jacob.
The whole point of this little essay was to promote "Vampire Awarness". Hug a Vamp, he might be having a bad day/night? Just.....WATCH YOUR NECK!!
I want to thank everyone who entered my blog contest namely, Shannon Cress, Mary Macko, Denise Csokuly, Margie Russo, Josh Stewart (and Josh, I will be using your idea for another blog!), Nancy, Ball, Nicole Garofolo, Suzanne Whitney, Sherry Springer Mitchell, Teresa Lantz-Thomas, Kyra Robinson, Shannon Burge, Danny Shore, Colleen Kudis, David Stiffler, Uncle Danny (Sammy) in England, who told me a truly chilling ghost story and last but not least Stacy Bell.
So, inconclusion, wait, I hear a noise...I'll go out and check to see what it is....as spoken by every first dead guy in every horror movie. HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!! xoxxoxo Pam...Mrs. Barnabas Collins.
